In my second week of classes here at Machon Schechter, we went on a south to the Negev Wednesday-Thursday. It was AMAZING. It was just what I needed to remember why I'm here and why I am obsessively in love with this country.
The programming itself was a little less than stellar, and our tour guide, while a nice guy, spoke English poorly (to a group of individuals who take classes in Hebrew...) and he was not particularly knowledgeable. Nor were our stops particularly interesting in their own right (unless you count the whole "staring at sweeping vistas" thing, which of course, I do).
But the fact that we were in the Negev, the untamed southern wilderness, with its quiet and its remoteness and grubby, dusty vestige of the Zionism I love, was enough for me. For me, one of the best things in the world is to be on a bus, traveling south, watching the changing scenery while listening to Israeli music (I'd even made a "desert playlist" for the occasion)! I love the change from the Judaean hills outside of Jerusalem, through the flatter hills, to the rocky upper Negev...
And we passed by all of my old haunts: Beit Shemesh, Arad, Tzeilim (the army base where I did "Sar-El" for a few weeks)... it conjured a mix of emotions and nostalgia, mostly in a good way. We were very close to the Egyptian border (we could see an army base a few kilometers away, doing night-time stuff), which is a little nerve-wracking at the moment, but really, it felt good. We did a four-hour hike which was warm and dusty and wonderful. We also had a wonderful campfire where we watched the twinkling stars and I actually jammed with a classmate on my guitar!!!!
Last time I lived here for an extended period of time was 1998. That was ten years ago - an entire lifetime in regards to the political situation of this country - and an entire lifetime for me as well. This "visit" has two overarching themes: I want to reclaim the idealism of my first 18-year-old Israel experience, Year Course, while at the same time refining it and settling into a more mature approach to this country. Then, I was in love with the myth (in the national consensus sense, not the "fake" sense). In 1998, reality tempered the myth a little bit. Now, ten years later, I hope to reconnect to that idyllic youthful place, but fall in love not only with the myth, but with the long-term consequences of that myth. I still marvel as I walk down the street and hear Hebrew - Eliezer Ben Yehudah's pioneering experiment worked! It stuck! With all its challenges and problems, Israel exists and survives. The Zionist program, I truly believe, is a success story. Israel is not perfect, but it is pretty cool. I don't want to lose this sense of love and amazement. I remain in love with Israel, both in founding myth and in enduring reality.
The trip to the wilderness, out of the anglo-centric religious and urban bustle of Jerusalem, reminded me of why I am here in the first place. I am, truly, despite my melanin-challenged European skin, a child of the desert. Like the Ethnix song "Tzipor Midbar (desert bird)," I am "like a bird, free, trying to touch the sky."
I think I tickled a cloud or two just a little bit. :o)
